"Gobbos fer dinner! Gobbos fer tea! Gobbos when u want ‘em! Gobbos for me!"
- —Battlecry of the Ruglud's Armoured Orcs.[1a]
Ruglud's Armoured Orcs are a famous band of mercenaries lead by the infamous Warlord, Ruglud Bonechewer. Ruglud is a powerful and wealthy Orc mercenary who sells his services all across the known world, from the treacherous Badlands in the south up through the realm of the Border Princes and throughout the mountains surrounding the Empire.[1a]
Rumours suggest that even the Empire itself has hired his services on occasion. Ruthless to the core, Ruglud's only loyalty is to himself and he has been known to change sides during battle if offered more payment and, more importantly, more opportunity to loot and pillage. Over the years the band has equipped itself with a motley assortment of equipment, stripping scraps of armour from countless defeated foes, and always taking the crossbows and bolts that they prize so highly. Though their brethren from the east despise them, and the Dwarfs of the Worlds Edge Mountains hunt them, the Orcish mercenaries under Ruglud Bonechewer have not only survived, but thrived as they roam the lands, offering their services to anyone for the right price, and the opportunity to loot the remains of their slain enemies.[1a]
Ruglud's Armoured Orcs are the only known instance of any Greenskin mob ever using crossbows. Some scholars claim that Orcs would not utilize crossbows unless instructed on how to, and blame the irresponsibility of Tilean soldiers of fortune who might have taught the Orcs how to operate such weapons.[4a]
History[]
"We'll show 'em how it's done."
- —Motto of the Ruglud's Armoured Orcs.[1a]
Ruglud's Armoured Orcs.
Ruglud Bonechewer was once a mighty Warlord of the Crooked Eye Tribe, leading these Greenskins towards countless victories over the course of his reign. Uniting the local tribes surrounding his domains within the Badlands, his army stormed his way through the Grey Mountains and Worlds Edge Mountains and upon the lowlands of the Empire itself. There he staged numerous successful raids upon numerous Dwarf strongholds and Empire towns, as well as upon various Goblin tribes that refused to grovel before him. In time however, Ruglud suffered one devastating defeat many miles to the east of the Old World, and in that defeat he also lost his position as Warlord of the Crooked Eye. Caught in a cunning and well implemented ambush by a powerful Chaos Dwarf slaver party, his tribe were cut down in their hundreds by the withering hail of missile fire that the Chaos Dwarfs sent into their midst. The Orcs returning missle barrage was unsurprisingly inaccurate. The heavy armour worn by the Chaos Dwarfs deflected the few arrows that found their targets.[1a]
As Ruglud fled, many of his tribe turned on him, blaming him in typical Orcish manner for the defeat. Ruglud bullied a small group of the Orcs into staying by his side and fled with them to the south, pursued by the arrows and insults of his former tribe. They came across an ancient, seemingly impenetrable stronghold built into the mountainside. It appeared to be deserted, and the superstitious Orcs cowered at the sound of the wind howling over its blackened battlements. As they picked their way around the huge boulders at the base of the stronghold's walls, the smallest member of the group, the runt known only as "Maggot", tripped and fell. Ruglud blinked in surprise, for the Goblin had disappeared from sight. Moments later, he stuck his head up through a hole in the ground, exclaiming that he had found a tunnel.[1a]
The Orcs refused to enter the tunnel, scared of the "bad spirits" that supposedly inhabited the stronghold. Ruglud pushed the Orcs aside roughly, determined to show them that he was not afraid. Besides, he thought, there might be something worth looting inside. Ruglud grabbed Maggot by the scruff of his neck and forced him to walk in front of him, into the low tunnel. They came upon a scene of devastation: the aftermath of a titanic battle in the tunnels and grand halls of what must have been a Dwarf stronghold. Dwarf bodies lay strewn across the floors in unbelievable numbers, and at first it looked to Ruglud as if Dwarf had been fighting Dwarf. As he looked closer at the bodies, he saw that some were the Chaos Dwarfs to whom he had suffered his great defeat.[1a]
Bloodied armour and weapons were scattered across the stone floor. At Ruglud's feet lay a Dwarf crossbow, which he absently picked up in one huge hand. His gaze lingered on the weapon as a sizable lump of masonry suddenly fell on his thick head, and a moment of inspiration washed over him. The unexpected thought filled his cunning, Orcish mind: If ya can't beat em, join 'em![1a]
He began to strip the armour of the Dwarfs' bodies, haphazardly strapping the plates to his over-sized frame. Climbing unsteadily out of the hole, he stood before his Orc followers who fell back before him. With a strange, determined look in his eyes, he growled at the Orcs: "We'll show 'em how it's done." And so the mercenary band known as Ruglud's Armoured Orcs was formed, the only known band of Orcs to implement the combination of armour and crossbow. They are still disliked and distrusted by other Orc tribes, but their fighting ability is grudgingly accepted. Wherever the band travels, it fights for gold and for food, and for the chance to strip the enemy of anything worth taking.[1a]
Appearance[]
Ruglud and 'is ladz wear heavy armour made from scrap found on the battlefield, including breastplates and shields, which they have strapped to their arms and upper body for protection.[1a]
Old Background (3rd Edition)[]
The Crooked Eye Orcs had travelled many miles westward to the Old World, suffering the sniping of mountain Goblins, incessant rain, and the endless whining of Bambrag, their incontinent shaman.
Once, they skirted a ruined Dwarfhold. Fear of spirits kept them from sheltering inside, but, a single Orc hero named Ruglud had dared to enter. He returned unharmed, but had not spoken since, and stated blankly into space.
The Orcs huddled in the rain before a rough stone wall across a narrow pass, while Chief Gudruk Bonechewer yelled at a figure on the battlements.
'Stoopid!', he screamed, 'Do we look like Chaos boys?'
'Zog off!' echoed the reply.
Gudruk returned to the tribe, dodging the hall of stones and garbage that accompanied this witty riposte.
'Lissen,' he said. 'Them kak-'ead Gobboes reckon the Chaos boys took ev'ryfink over. They ain't comin' out an' they ain't lettin' nuffink through. They got bows an' rocks an' spears an' stuff - if we was to try and get 'em, they'd crump us to bits.' He thought for a while.
'We needs volunteers', he announced at length. His warriors developed a sudden and compelling interest in the ground at their feet.
'Or armour', whined Bambrag, 'Couldn't touch us if we 'ad cans like real Chaos boys.'
'We ain't got cans, 'ave we, Trickle-legs?' snarled Gudruk.
'Cans... jus' lyin' where they dropped... all black an' spiky.'
It was Ruglud who spoke. Gudruk gave him a good shake to speed the recovery of his senses, and he continued dreamily.
'Down this Stunty-hole... lotsa rooms... lost... big room... big enough to stand up in... big pile of bones an' gear... spiky Stunties an' reg'lar ones... wiped each uvver out...'
'Yerrrss!' cried Gudruk, 'We'll 'ave some o' that! Come on, boys - it's Goblin-gizzard for supper!'.
A swift expedition returned to the Dwarfhold. The ill-fitting plates were roughly hammered into shape and held together with whatever came to hand. By nightfall, a small unit of armoured warriors was ready.
As the gear's discoverer and the bravest, meanest and certainly the most stupid Orc, Ruglud was made leader. At Gudruk's suggestion, Bambrag became the regimental musician on the Xylobone, a traditional Orcish instrument, and Maggot - Gudruk's youngest and most irritating whelp - joined the ranks as standard-bearer.
The tribe feasted upon Goblin-flesh long into the night - all except for Ruglud, who couldn't get his helmet off, and was reduced to sucking broth through a straw.
Battlecry[]
The most frequent battlecry is a repetitive chant of 'Gobbo fer tea, Gobbo fer tea, Gobbo, Gobbo, Gobbo fer tea!', with 'Stunty', 'Uman' and so on being substituted for 'Gobbo' as appropriate.
Deeds[]
The Commandos' first victory led to many more as they pushed across the Worlds' Mountains towards the old World. Most of these were over isolated Goblin strongholds, and are remembered only in the stories and drinking songs of the Crooked Eye Orcs - and then in versions which are probably wildly exaggerated. one confirmed exploit was the storming of Karak-Bazik, an outlier to the great Dwarven settlement of Zhufbar, when the Dwarfs were obliged to abandon the Dwarfhold and cave in a series of connecting tunnels to cover their retreat.
Uniforms[]
There is no uniform as such; the Commandos are dressed in a wide and miscellaneous range of armour. The Commandos never bothered to re-paint their shields to a standard design either, so this varies widely too. The regiment is equipped with heavy armour, shields, swords, crossbows and iron-hafted Dwarven halberds.
Sources[]
- 1: Warhammer Chronicles 2003 (supplement)
- 1a: pg. 53
- 2: The Stuff of Legends - RRD5 Ruglud's Armoured Orcs - Spike-Can Commandos.
- 3: Warhammer Chronicles 2004 (6th Edition)
- 3a: pg. 67
- 4: Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay 4th Edition: Tribes and Tribulations (RPG)
- 4a: pg. 54
Miniatures[]
