- "As soon as their jolly boat touched the sand they roared ashore, charging straight into the waiting Goblins. It was a short fight. Within moments the greenskins were fleeing for their lives and the pirates were rewarding themselves with a swift tot of rum."
- —Von Mirrenburg, from his book My Time with the Dwarfs.[1a]
Long Drong Slayer's Pirates (or Long Drong's Slayer Pirates[2a]) are an infamous band of mercenary Sea Slayers that travel the seven seas aboard the Fair Fregar. They specialise in recovering lost pay chests - for the right price.[1a]
- "Fifteen Dwarfs and a dead Dwarf's chest,
Yo, ho, ho and a flagon of ale.
Each one a goner means more for the rest!
Yo, ho, ho and a barrel of ale."
- —Dwarf Pirate sea shanty and the Slayer Pirates' battle-cry.[1a]
Long Drong, who as his name suggests was a rather tall Dwarf and claimed a dubious line of descent from Drong the Hard, a legendary Dwarf ancestor known from many sagas, began his career as a Dwarf seafarer in the seaport of Barak Varr. He worked his way up from cabin Dwarf to captain of the Dwarf trading ship The Barrel of Ale which brought fine Dwarf brews by the sea route to faraway colonies. That was until one terrible voyage around the coast of Sartosa. A storm blew up, the worst storm seen for a hundred years, and the ship foundered on the treacherous rocks. Although the crew were washed up on the shore, the entire cargo of rare Dwarf ales was lost.[1a]
This disaster was something no Dwarf could bear, and no self-respecting Dwarf captain would wish to survive. Long Drong knew his career as a Dwarf trader was over. He resolved to become a Slayer on the seven seas and to seek a heroic end worthy of a saga. His crew, who were just as shamed by the loss of the cargo as their captain, followed his example and swore upon their ancestors to lead a life of roving Sea Slayers until a worthy death ended their shame and redeemed them in legend.[1a]
Having thus sworn, Long Drong, now known as Long Drong Slayer, trekked inland to his destiny, which was to become the most notorious pirate ever to lurk on Sartosa. His first act was to storm the stronghold of the dreaded pirate Capitano Sisicco and capture his ship and treasure stash. With the latter, Long Drong hired Dwarf craftsmen to rebuild the flimsy vessel into something a Dwarf could be proud of, not sparing the iron. He also hired Dwarf smiths to forge cannons on the vessel, which Long Drong named The Fair Fregar after a famous Dwarf maiden of Barak Varr, rumoured to be extremely beautiful. A figurehead representing her was carved by the crew. Unfortunately, neither Long Drong nor any of his crew had ever seen a real-life Dwarf maiden, so they had to rely on their imagination and hearsay. The result, parts of which were shod in brass, made an awesome ram on the prow of the ship.[1a]
The prisoners, now chained in Long Drong's dungeons, were freed in return for telling him all they knew about buried treasure and handing over any maps they had. Long Drong learned that the key to success was often the possession of a pay chest full of gold in which to hire a mercenary army and to hold it together under your command. Many such pay chests had been lost in battles and there were mercenary generals willing to pay handsomely for their return, even double the value of anything inside the chest, or a great fortune for the empty chest alone. This was because recovery of a lost pay chest is a matter of pride among mercenary generals, who regard such chests in the same way as other races do their army standards.[1a]
So Long Drong let it be known that, being a seafaring Dwarf, he could seek out and rescue a lost pay chest wherever it may be in the known world and return it to its rightful owner. All he asked was to keep any treasure that he might find in it, plus a reward in gold equal to as much as the chest would hold! By the standards of mercenary generals this was but a small price to pay for the restoration of honour and respect, and soon offers to hire his services came flowing in by swift messengers.[1a]
Thus the Fair Fregar voyaged to many distant lands; Araby, Lustria, Albion and many uncharted islands, and brought back various pay chests which may or may not have been genuine. In doing so Long Drong raided the treasure hoards of many notorious pirates and corsairs and made countless enemies determined to get their revenge on him. A price was on his head, everyone sought to accomplish his doom. What more could a seafaring Slayer ask for! His only friends turned out to be those mercenary generals whose honour he had restored, and these soon began to hire Long Drong and his pirate crew to fight as a regiment in his armies. Their task, needless to say, was to seek out and capture the enemy pay chest on the battlefield. Only the reckless Dwarf Sea Slayers seeking a heroic end would take on or succeed in such a task. As yet Long Drong has still not met his doom.[1a]
The Slayer Pirates
- "Lost pay chest recovery our speciality"
- —Motto of the Slayer Pirates.[1a]
The Slayer Pirates fight in a unit of 10 to 30 warriors, including Long Drong, a standard-bearer and a drummer.[2a]
Long Drong Slayer has a hook hand, peg leg, eyepatch, long red plaited beard, pistols stuffed down his breeches and a parrot on his shoulder which says 'bits o' gold, bits o' gold' all the time. His crew are a swarthy bunch of rogues who are proud to fight under the skulls and crossbones flag. All the pirates are festooned with pistols, which they shoot off in a hurricane of destruction. They carry so many pistols that they never need to reload.[1a]
When unable to get ale, the Dwarf pirates brew their own drink. This dangerous stuff is a sort of rum mixed with gunpowder and iron filings, and each bottle has a skull and crossbones on it as a warning. The pirates swig so much of this concoction that they are now immune to drunkenness, though it wreaks havoc with their insides. Before a battle the Dwarfs will knock back a few bottles each, and the resultant intestinal rumblings and gurglings leave an odious mist hanging around the regiment. Though the pirates claim not to notice the smell the effect is dire on the enemy (except, obviously, for Undead foes and Daemons and followers of Nurgle). The great disadvantage to the pirates is that no other troops will stand near them.[1a]
- "I bite them first!"
- —Kazrik Sharkbiter.
- Long Drong Slayer - Former captain of the Barrel of Ale, current captain and leader of the Slayer Pirates.[1a]
- Kazrik Sharkbiter - Former crewman aboard the Barrel of Ale who took the Slayer Oath alongside Long Drong. He fights as a Doomseeker.
- Long Drong's name is directly inspired from that of Long John Silver, one of the main characters in R. L. Stevenson's Treasure Island.
- 1: Warhammer Armies: Dogs of War (5th Edition)
- 1a: pp. 34-35
- 2: Warhammer Chronicles 2004 (6th Edition)
- 2a: pg. 65
- 3: Ninja Division - Doomseeker: Kazrik Sharkbiter